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15 Steps to Grieving an Identity

9/27/2012

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Identity = Anything that we have attached something about ourselves to. If we try to release or let go of it, causes pain or fear within ourselves. 

As we move through this process of awakening, all of those low-vibrational "identities" that we have established also start to try to dissolve or fall away. Sometimes this is because, on a higher level, we understand that something no longer serves a purpose or it may "get ripped" from us due to "circumstances" that we can no longer control. This would also be realized by asking the question "Who am I if I let this go?" If an immediate response is "I don't know", or confusion, fear... then that is a huge indicator that we have tied some or much of our identity to that thing. Now, this is not about losing that "thing", but our attachment to it over what is for best and highest good. If we can resolve the attachment to it, while doing best and highest good for all, be willing to "lose" it or "walk away" if we need to, then we technically don't have to "lose" that thing. 

Letting go also includes any"thing" we value over our purpose here. We don't always understand it, but when it is time for us to step into our "callings", if we are not in the place we need to be,  we are "stripped" of everything that would hold us back from "what we are to accomplish". Anything we would have "put first" gets taken away if we don't let it go when we are "prompted to" on our own. People & things can be used distractions from us working on ourselves, getting where we need to be, and basically attention on something other than self-less service to humanity. 

It is now (again) coming to the time as lightworkers, wayshowers, healers, helpers, light beings, angels, whatever term you want to use, that we are having to step up our game, get ourselves right so that we can "do our job" of what we came here for. In extreme cases, that means "losing" everything we have come to attached to in this physical world that we place more value on over our "mission" or "purpose". Not everyone sees this, so this is irrelevant to those who don't. But others will completely identify and understand. 

Now, for the sake of our purpose, we will be provided with "avenues" to serve. If we are so focused on other stuff, we may not "see" them. So paying attention to absolutely everything is "key" and vital. Pay attention to the signs (an old channeling message that keeps coming through). If we "see" something that needs to go, we can choose to release it at a comfort level that we prefer. We can ease into it. For awhile, circumstances will continue to arise to allow us to do this. But, if we don't pay attention, if we don't listen, we may be presented with circumstances out of our control and forcing through it anyways. And this is when suffering begins, because we no longer have a choice in the matter. It gets done for us.

An example may be strong desire to leave a job, but choosing not to because of the financial ramifications. Years later, that person may be laid off anyways, lost their home and ended up moving to another location. The purpose all along may have been to get that someone to that location and remove all of the obstacles. This could also be loss of a relationship that one would have chosen over selfless service. 

Some examples of identities that we have tied ourselves to are people, situations, relationships, things, places, illnesses, mentality (victim). Basically anything we fight releasing that we "claim" as part of our existence.

Now it appears that not everyone has to "lose" as much (yet), as we are going through this in waves. Some who "get it" and release and then turn around to start creating & manifesting a new reality seem to go through with more ease? Or do they? Others may not have "stepped" into their calling yet. But then there are those who are hearing "it is time" and we know... and we have to start releasing & letting go at a faster rate. With the proper tools, this can be recognized quicker and worked through from an entirely different perspective.

Perspective #1: I am a victim and I am losing something
Perspective #2: This is part of my purpose & these things have to go. I don't need to understand it, because I "get it" within. I choose to let go and embrace the light that comes with the higher vibration coming in to me in it's place. (Perspective #2 rocks!)

Hopefully, this "grieving" process may help expedite for another. This is one I created to quickly move through & raise my vibration up even higher. 

Grieving an identity:
  1. Realize "that" is not you. "That" is something outside of you. 
  2. Validate self that it is ok to feel this way. 
  3. Set a time limit (this keeps us from getting stuck in victim mode)
  4. Own it or it owns you
  5. Make a choice (Hold on or let go)
  6. Find the gratitude in the situation. No matter how "bad" it is, is can always be worse. 
  7. Shift perspectives. Find a new one. 
  8. Recognize the identity you are releasing. This can be in form of an attachment to a person, situation or a thing. 
  9. Move THROUGH it. Don't suppress it. Allow it to flow through & out. 
  10. See it as an opportunity to heal through love.
  11. Recognize the emotions that can surface in grieving an identity like sadness, heart pain, anger, pity, blame, being a victim. Activate & expedite these, recognize them and let them go (safely). They will anchor in your body/energy field if you hold on or suppress them.
  12. There is no right or wrong. It just is.
  13. There is no fault, blame, shame, guilt. It just is.
  14. Know that you will eventually use this to help another heal.
  15. Say "Thank You" and FEEL it. 

Now cut any lingering cords and let it go. Don't go back and pull it back in. Step forward into love.

Many operating from a purely physical standpoint will see this as cold. It is not cold, it is necessary. We are not doing it because we don't care. We are doing it because we do care, but from a much higher place. It is no longer about our "little self". It is about the bigger picture. In the physical, we can't always see. This is why trust in our hearts and the universe (or whatever you trust in that is a PART of you) is so important. 

Love yourself and know that everything is happening exactly as it is meant to be. And NOTHING is personal. Not even our act of letting go or the universe's act of bringing us "there". It is all part of the Divine. 

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